Love is a Steaming Pile of Shit
Love and shit has a lot more in common than you think
Yes, you read it right. “How ?” You might ask. They are so different ! One keeps you up at night, all smiley and giggly, and the other one wakes you up at night, and makes you race to the toilet. One fills up your stomach with butterflies, the other one… Just what happens when you eat butterflies. Or other food, for that matter.
But, with all those differences, Love and shit has a lot of similarities you might never notice before. So gather round children, bring your pens and notebooks because old professor here will drop some knowledge.
Can’t be forced.
Love is an intense feeling of deep affection, which come involuntary. When you truly love someone or something, you may not be able to fully explain why you love them, because you just do. You can like someone or something very much, but love is a whole another level. And sometimes, even when you like someone very much, the sparks of love may not come anyway, because you cannot force love.
Shit is the same. Maybe you have a daily schedule, but still, if your body is not ready to let go of that shit, no matter how much you push, you won’t shit.
But also, to make it work, both need a little push. When the butterflies are buzzing, it’s up to you to declare your love, or forever hold you peace. With shit, you also need to push it, and push it real good you do, so it will come out.
It will come at the right time.
In relation to the previous point, you cannot force love and shit, because if it is right, it will come at the right time. For example, you’re with the girl/guy that you’ve been dating for a while, you like them so much, but you’re not really sure about things. And it will only take one random conversation, or a movement, or even a glance, then suddenly you know you’re in love.
Shit, is also like that. Again, you may have a daily schedule, but you never know for sure. When YOUR BODY IS READY, then shit will comes naturally. If you force it, you’re only gonna hurt your butthole.
If you force love, you will only hurt yourself. And others.
You cannot be sure until it happens
Have you ever get that funny feeling in your stomach, then you sit down on the toilet, thinking you’re gonna shit, but turns out it just farts ?
Yeah it happens, right.
Some with love. You may feel the butterflies, you have a strong connection, you have a great chemistry, buuuut.. Turns out you’re better as friends. Or it’s just physical attraction. Or you think you love the person, but in reality you’re only in love with the idea of a person. It’s not real love, bud.
It can hurt you
Forcing love will hurt you.
Pretending to be in love will hurt you.
Unrequited love will hurt you.
Loving the wrong person will hurt you.
Loving the right person in the wrong time will hurt you.
So many ways love can hurt you. Shit is more or less the same.
Forcing shit will hurt you.
Shitting too much will hurt you.
Shitting too little will hurt you.
Sometimes, just shitting will hurt you because your fiber consumption is lacking.
Now, you see, kids. Love and shit has a lot more in common. I hope this piece will give you a new perspective about love and shit, and you may take wiser decisions regarding both.
Love and shit will give you unnecessary drama in life. But can you imagine life without shitting ?
Can you imagine life, without love ?
